Reader Writes - March 2021

I’m very hesitant about writing this; you’ll see in a moment. All friends (I thank God for them) and many neighbours and acquaintances know. So it feels a bit indulgent and repetitive to talk about it here; but I feel there are things worth sharing. It started some 3 years ago when I began trailing behind my bicycling comrades; they thought I was being gentlemanly by bringing up the rear, but in fact I was struggling to keep up. When I took these symptoms to the GP I got a good laugh. How old are you?! Eventually, having very thoroughly ruled out all the usual suspects, last autumn I managed to get an appointment with a consultant (plot spoiler: he was a neurologist). Puffing behind his mask and within 15 minutes, with an air of encouragement, he had a diagnosis. You have Parkinson’s Disease!

So at last I know that I am one of some hundred and sixty thousand people in Britain whose substantia nigra region at the base of the brain fails to produce sufficient dopamine. This is a messenger that connects the brain to the rest of the nervous system. Prominent symptoms among many include tremor, stiffness, poor balance, slowness etc. It’s a beast, but I’m assured you die with it rather than of it! And staying fit is really helpful, so the bike is muddy and well exercised.

I have a lot to be very thankful for. Our clan have excellent support, helpful medication, and dedicated NHS professionals. Christian friends have been wonderful; I’ve been anointed with healing oil, fervently prayed over and endlessly supported. When I moaned that I felt like a prisoner with a life sentence I was sharply and lovingly reprimanded by one friend; No, she said, you hold the key! Here’s where faith helps. God is sovereign and has our lives in his hands. We long for healing, but healing and wholeness can come in many ways. Whilst I’d love to escape Parkinson’s altogether, and everything is possible with God, healing may mean learning to live with it, and live well.

Along these lines I had a great spiritual encounter on a Cornish cliff last Autumn. Walking the coastal path we came to a headland buffeted by strong wind. Leaving wife and sister clinging to the turf in a hollow at a safe distance, I resolutely took the narrow path to the point where wind lashed the cliffs over a boiling sea. There, enjoying the tumultuous scene, I had my own conversation with God. “Why, Lord, Why??!”. It was an epiphany experience; almost immediately with striking clarity Paul’s words to the church in Corinth came into my mind. “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2Cor12:9.

Those are familiar and comforting words, but in an instant with salty wind on my face, and gulls riding the airstreams, I knew this verse to be practical and personal. First, it is simple; God always equips us with gifts and power sufficient for whatever task he gives us; the apostle Paul wrestled with his own problems whilst declaring its truth. But there is more; secondly, God is also able to use us and empower us best when we accept our own weakness. Lord, we can’t but you can, through us, if we let you; thank you!

Robert MacCurrach